Cupcakes, chaos and clemency

Yesterday I felt like I was on top of the world.

I worked from 7am, then after a long day of hard work, I cleaned our entire flat. Our place was tidy and spotless, which always makes me happy. Then after that my husband and I went for a long run by the lagoon and to the beach, where we watched the sunset together. Then after that we went home, had a small dinner and then watched a session of a Philippians teaching by Matt Chandler, where he spoke about being humble and lowly, and counting others more significant than ourselves.

Philippians 2:3-8 (ESV)

"Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind amongst yourselves which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the form of a bondservant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross."

I felt so inspired after watching that session, ready to take on the world loving everyone, being humble and obedient and living a life like Christ! So far, my day had gone perfect, and all that was left for me to do was bake the vanilla cupcakes with fudge icing which I had decided while I was cleaning. I made the batter, and it was the most perfect and delicious batter I had ever made. I even called my husband to come and see how perfect the batter came out. Then I put the batter into the oven. They were rising perfectly. I was so excited about my cupcakes and how perfect they would be. My day couldn't have ended better.

Somehow, for a few moments, I got distracted and left the cupcakes in the oven just slightly longer than needed. When I took them out, they were a bit hard and dense. I was somewhat disappointed. It was already bedtime, I was exhausted after such a long and eventful day, and the last thing I wanted to  do was clean a messy kitchen (after all, I had just cleaned the whole flat). So, I decided to go to bed, leaving the mess for the morning, which is something I never ever do.

This morning, I woke up grumpier than ever! My poor husband... I overslept, was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open and even moaned at my husband for making Rooibos tea instead of coffee (I needed the caffeine!). He even sent me back to bed so that I could wake up in a better mood. I was complaining about the messy kitchen, my flopped cupcakes, and even the washing that I had left to lie in the machine through the night after its cycle.  I felt so sorry for myself. My husband kissed me goodbye and left for work, leaving me to quickly tidy a bit and get ready for work before I get in a worse mood for being late. I hate being late. As I stood in the kitchen, still half asleep and very frustrated for various reasons, I burst into tears. 

How selfish, conceited, arrogant and ungrateful I was. All I've been doing since I woke up was grumble, moan and complain, thinking only of myself and no one and nothing around me. Just last night I was excited about living a humble and obedient Christ-like life, and there I stood in my kitchen, just a few hours later, having a breakdown over cupcakes, whilst others have way more difficult things to deal with. I cried and prayed and asked the Lord for forgiveness, and phoned my husband and told him I was sorry.

In order to live a Christ-like life, we need to be humble, counting others more significant than ourselves. We need to bear the fruit of the Spirit, be gentle and have self-control. The way I carried on was completely the opposite. I pulled myself together, asked the Lord for help and guidance in living a life like He did, and went to work, leaving the house in the same mess as last night. Even our bed was unmade! I decided that I would sort it all out tonight.

When I got home, I made the fudge icing and reached another stumbling block, but this time I handled it differently. The method in making the fudge icing is almost like making real fudge. The mixture had to boil and reach the soft-ball stage... Do you think I got it right? No. But this time I didn't grumble or feel sorry for myself. I did what I could to make the best of the icing and, even though it wasn't perfect, it didn't come out too bad.

I have learnt quite a lesson. It's amazing how the Lord can take any situation or predicament in our lives and teach and guide us through them. It's in these moments and days that He reveals more of Himself to us. We will never get it perfect, but it is extremely important to practice the fruit of the Spirit in our lives and constantly strive to live a life according to God's word and His standards.

James 4:6 (ESV)

"God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

Even though my cupcakes probably won't taste as grand as they look, at least I know my husband will eat them, all of them. He always knows how to put a smile on my face. And God always knows my heart and He has grace for me.

God bless x